Book Reviews - Murders/Suicide at WHF

[bloggs and son]

I think that's true, Mertol, but the question for me is: what exactly does love mean to him? He walked out on his vulnerable wife and twin babies when the boys were just 4 or 5 months old. I don't believe he visited them for a year or so, did he? That seems to me quite a hard hearted thing to do.

Yes that's not a good thing to do. She could have been suffering from post natal depression and that is the very time a mother needs help with the children as she doesn't even know what is going on in her own mind.

[maggie]

I think that's true, Mertol, but the question for me is: what exactly does love mean to him? He walked out on his vulnerable wife and twin babies when the boys were just 4 or 5 months old. I don't believe he visited them for a year or so, did he? That seems to me quite a hard hearted thing to do.

Thank you Keira, that is the thing.  I do agree with you, I would think it was devastating for Sheila and also for June and Ralph.  Its all very well attacking them but Sheila's illness would make her hold grudges and obsess about every little thing.  I still can't go with the fact that she was anything but loved even tho they made mistakes.  Colin was so quick to blame them but they did everything, provided houses he lived in no doubt took money and they loved his boys.  Sheila's illness was very real.

[Nuala]

Yes that's not a good thing to do. She could have been suffering from post natal depression and that is the very time a mother needs help with the children as she doesn't even know what is going on in her own mind.

Left with twin babies too, it must have been so hard for the poor girl.

[maggie]

Left with twin babies too, it must have been so hard for the poor girl.

Yes and the boys were loved by the grandparents. They read them bedtime stories and theyran free on the farm.  If June did a bit of religious wrath of god it was no doubt more difficult for them because of their mum but it is reported they loved the farm in spite of that.  Sheila was sick and struggling, it is a pity he decided to say he always loved her at the end of the book when he had not supported her at all.

[Nuala]

Sheila was stuck in a flat with those babies too. I know it was a luxury flat in a mansion block, but it wasn't as though she could put them outside in the fresh air and sit with them for a while or get on with housework.

There was a communal garden, which was fenced, I believe, opposite the mansion block. Sheila's friends told Claire Powell that Sheila would take the boys to the park to find someone to talk to, because she was all alone in the flat and babies are not really company for a young woman. Sheila's friends said they found her to be a very needy person, she was desperate to talk and wanted her friends to guide her, almost as though she saw them as proxy mothers.

[mertol22]

The other books on the maiden 1st post ive not read, i wanted to know more about the two families how a woman feels to me is alien i dont understand i have had no need to if the love died from colin then i dont see what more could have been done, sheila lost colin, colin lost his sons life dealt a very painfull ledger to them both.

[maggie]

Sheila was stuck in a flat with those babies too. I know it was a luxury flat in a mansion block, but it wasn't as though she could put them outside in the fresh air and sit with them for a while or get on with housework.

There was a communal garden, which was fenced, I believe, opposite the mansion block. Sheila's friends told Claire Powell that Sheila would take the boys to the park to find someone to talk to, because she was all alone in the flat and babies are not really company for a young woman. Sheila's friends said they found her to be a very needy person, she was desperate to talk and wanted her friends to guide her, almost as though she saw them as proxy mothers.

Poor sheila, any mum would understand how hard it must have been for her.  Those mansion flats have small windows, they are dark and uninviting.  She must have felt very isolated.  I feel everything she tried was a disaster but you dont get as ill as sheila because things are a disaster, you get ill like that possibly because you are genetically prone to be. Seriously, depression is not schizophrenia, although a side effect of schizophrenia is depression.  A girl without those genetics would have coped differently. imho

[maggie]

The other books on the maiden 1st post ive not read, i wanted to know more about the two families how a woman feels to me is alien i dont understand i have had no need to if the love died from colin then i dont see what more could have been done, sheila lost colin, colin lost his sons life dealt a very painfull ledger to them both.

I dont really know how to explain mertol, except that colin knew sheila was ill.  He knew she had difficulties with the person most important to her...her mum and felt unloved.  Colin apparently had a good relationship with his mum, who was normal enough.  He still had a long term relationship with Sheila various tries at babies.  Poor sheila was a mess from miscarriages to abortions.  How can we understand that but when finally she had his twins he walked away.  I know he was probably young but his behaviour was not great.  She was a pretty girl who had been built up to believe she was a beauty but she couldn't keep her man.  Tradgedy, whatever happened, sheila's life was a tradgedy.  imho

[Nuala]

Poor sheila, any mum would understand how hard it must have been for her.  Those mansion flats have small windows, they are dark and uninviting.  She must have felt very isolated.  I feel everything she tried was a disaster but you dont get as ill as sheila because things are a disaster, you get ill like that possibly because you are genetically prone to be. Seriously, depression is not schizophrenia, although a side effect of schizophrenia is depression.  A girl without those genetics would have coped differently. imho

I think so too, Mags. Sheila's friends said that when the boys were of school age they were pale, thin and fragile little boys who seemed not to know what to do with themselves until Sheila told them what to do.

Sheila would sit on a bench in the garden with one of the other mothers and say that she was worried about her boys because they were such wimps. The twins would run back to Sheila and just hover around her and she would become irritated with them and tell them to go and play, because they didn't know they wanted to play unless she told them to.

What I find odd is that Sheila would criticise the boys for hanging around her and for their failure to be as she wanted them to be, more outgoing, I suppose and more masculine. Yet Sheila had this obsessive fear that the boys would have sex with her or rape her, but I suppose these were the irrational fears she had due to her illness. These fears were the opposite of how things really were with this family.

[bloggs and son]

I think so too, Mags. Sheila's friends said that when the boys were of school age they were pale, thin and fragile little boys who seemed not to know what to do with themselves until Sheila told them what to do.

Sheila would sit on a bench in the garden with one of the other mothers and say that she was worried about her boys because they were such wimps. The twins would run back to Sheila and just hover around her and she would become irritated with them and tell them to go and play, because they didn't know they wanted to play unless she told them to.

What I find odd is that Sheila would criticise the boys for hanging around her and for their failure to be as she wanted them to be, more outgoing, I suppose and more masculine. Yet Sheila had this obsessive fear that the boys would have sex with her or rape her, but I suppose these were the irrational fears she had due to her illness. These fears were the opposite of how things really were with this family.

Apparently when children are at a very young age that is when they learn the most and it is usually the mother who imparts the most useful information to them?

[guest154]

I learnt a ton from my Mum but that is because she was the only one around. She taught me all of the basics and the foundations fo life. So yeah I agree the Mum plays a massive role in the development of a child.

[Nuala]

Apparently when children are at a very young age that is when they learn the most and it is usually the mother who imparts the most useful information to them?

That is so, but it's also important to have a father figure too because the male brings the outside world into the home and the male role model. Sheila's little boys lacked that model for around a year and when they did have contact with their father again it wasn't constant.

[maggie]

I think so too, Mags. Sheila's friends said that when the boys were of school age they were pale, thin and fragile little boys who seemed not to know what to do with themselves until Sheila told them what to do.

Sheila would sit on a bench in the garden with one of the other mothers and say that she was worried about her boys because they were such wimps. The twins would run back to Sheila and just hover around her and she would become irritated with them and tell them to go and play, because they didn't know they wanted to play unless she told them to.

What I find odd is that Sheila would criticise the boys for hanging around her and for their failure to be as she wanted them to be, more outgoing, I suppose and more masculine. Yet Sheila had this obsessive fear that the boys would have sex with her or rape her, but I suppose these were the irrational fears she had due to her illness. These fears were the opposite of how things really were with this family.

Have actually seen this in action so obviously not as bad as sheilas boys.  My girls were so healthy and strong minded they demanded to make their own choices but other kids couldn't do that they didnt know how to make a decision.  Well I don't know, it was just crap for those poor little boys...I think they were loved by colin and by their grandparents even if some of it was a bit scary. I would imagine Sheila as an adopted girl must have adored her own children, her flesh and blood, the acceptance that she was and of her own existence.  If she wanted to kill herself, and that is a 50% chance with a schizophrenic she could never have left her beloved boys behind her. I still think her depression from her schizophrenia became too much.  What Ralph and June were discussing that Jeremy was half listening to was scarcely heard by Sheila trying to deal with her own stuff.  She chose that night to kill herself, it was for sure easy enough, there were guns everywhere.  If I wanted to kill myself in 1985 I would have headed for WHF. She decided to take her own life, the drugs, the men, the promises, come on she was in a really bad place. Someone heard and woke up  June and Neville's beloved grandchildren shot, their daughter....put yourself in their place.  Domestic not calculated murder.

[bloggs and son]

That is so, but it's also important to have a father figure too because the male brings the outside world into the home and the male role model. Sheila's little boys lacked that model for around a year and when they did have contact with their father again it wasn't constant.

My mother was left by my father, who ran off with another woman when my brother and I were at a very early age and she brought us up on her own.
My mother is still alive and is in her 90's and is living in the Republic of Ireland (Kerry) My father died a few years back. I never hated him. But he did miss out on those important years. He never did understand children and thought he could treat us boys the same as those soldiers under his command in the army. He was very strict and used to smack us quite a lot in order to discipline us. He never showed us much love unfortunately which would have balanced things out a bit.

[maggie]

My mother was left by my father, who ran off with another woman when my brother and I were at a very early age and she brought us up on her own.
My mother is still alive and is in her 90's and is living in the Republic of Ireland (Kerry) My father died a few years back. I never hated him. But he did miss out on those important years. He never did understand children and thought he could treat us boys the same as those soldiers under his command in the army. He was very strict and used to smack us quite a lot in order to discipline us. He never showed us much love unfortunately which would have balanced things out a bit.

Grahame did he know what love was, maybe he'd never learned that.  Not everyone knows that instinctively.xx