Jeremy Bamber posts bizarre apology for 'failing to clear his name'

[Jan]

If they hated Julie as alleged then they would not have approved of the marriage. A mother who hates the intended spouse- for whatever the reason- is going to voice objection not pleasure.

Saying they approved so he was postponing things certainly sounds to me like it was being represented as an effort to spite them.

I think it was said that June just did not want them to "live in sin" perhaps she would have been happier if was all official.

[Jane]

If they hated Julie as alleged then they would not have approved of the marriage. A mother who hates the intended spouse- for whatever the reason- is going to voice objection not pleasure.

Saying they approved so he was postponing things certainly sounds to me like it was being represented as an effort to spite them.

You're making assumptions. I said we have no way of knowing WHAT was said in that conversation. It's highly unlikely, but not impossible that they said that if he married Julie they disinherit him. It's also possible that he thought that marrying Julie would wind them up and when they showed approval, he went off the idea. They could have approved the marriage on moral grounds without approving his choice of bride. There are numerous permutations here.....................we will never know.

[Jan]

Children who buck their parents just to rebel are extremely immature and do have mental issues.  To still act that way as an adult demonstrates even more mental issues.  Ann Eaton among others described things Jeremy would do out of spite including refusing to dress up when going to places with Nevill where looking sophisticated would have pleased Nevill.  Jeremy clearly was an immature idiot with grievances against his parents- he didn't steal from them because he loved them so much.  This obviously demonstrated the absence of the usual emotional connection that would inhibit killing your parents for money.   

I thought Anne had memory problems ? And it is surprising that if Jeremy had mental problems his father made complimentary comments about his farming and allowed him to have shares in the caravan business. Plus many would describe teenagers rebelling as part of growing up and establishing their own personalities.  I don't doubt he may have been a tad arrogant  - but mental problems established by him having the odd argument with his parents? Sorry I don't agree. The murders yes - but using that behaviour ?  Sorry I disagree.

[scipio_usmc]

I think it was said that June just did not want them to "live in sin" perhaps she would have been happier if was all official.

If you don't like the intended spouse you voice opposition. They were not even living together at the time anyway.

[lookout]

June had a bee in her bonnet about them living together at Goldhanger bringing shame on the family. There's every likelihood that June had mentioned being married before living together and because of that Jeremy would have felt as though he was being pushed into something that he felt he wasn't ready for and this could quite possibly have been a reason that the relationship was fizzling out.
What man of 24 would want to take that order from their mother ? Maybe Jeremy had been too ashamed to tell JM of his mother's wishes ? Whereas,you'd have JM tugging at one end and the voice of his mother in his ear talking about immorality.
Talk about being between the devil and the deep blue sea.

[scipio_usmc]

I thought Anne had memory problems ? And it is surprising that if Jeremy had mental problems his father made complimentary comments about his farming and allowed him to have shares in the caravan business. Plus many would describe teenagers rebelling as part of growing up and establishing their own personalities.  I don't doubt he may have been a tad arrogant  - but mental problems established by him having the odd argument with his parents? Sorry I don't agree. The murders yes - but using that behaviour ?  Sorry I disagree.

She had memory problems related to some details of the investigation. Trying to say she would not be able to remember things about the family doesn't work.

You so desperately want to believe Jeremy is innocent you ignore all evidence of the problems he had with his parents.  I don't suffer from such blinders.  It is obvious he had problems with them and that such problems overrode the natural order of things where a child would not kill their parents for money.

[scipio_usmc]

June had a bee in her bonnet about them living together at Goldhanger bringing shame on the family. There's every likelihood that June had mentioned being married before living together and because of that Jeremy would have felt as though he was being pushed into something that he felt he wasn't ready for and this could quite possibly have been a reason that the relationship was fizzling out.
What man of 24 would want to take that order from their mother ? Maybe Jeremy had been too ashamed to tell JM of his mother's wishes ? Whereas,you'd have JM tugging at one end and the voice of his mother in his ear talking about immorality.
Talk about being between the devil and the deep blue sea.

Not liking them live together at Goldhanger unmarried doesn't mean she hated Julie.  It means she didn't want him living with someone unmarried.  They were not living together at the time of the engagement, she already had stopped living with him at that point.   

[Jane]

If you don't like the intended spouse you voice opposition. They were not even living together at the time anyway.

I guess here you're saying that YOU would voice opposition. They are many who would go no further than offering their best wishes and congratulations It isn't strictly any parent's business who their offspring marry. The parental choice of spouse probably isn't the one their offspring would choose.

[lookout]

Not liking them live together at Goldhanger unmarried doesn't mean she hated Julie.  It means she didn't want him living with someone unmarried.  They were not living together at the time of the engagement, she already had stopped living with him at that point.

No,June didn't hate Julie-----------she just called her a harlot in front of Jeremy and I don't know who else.
Isn't this like a lot of mothers whose sons introduce their girlfriends where it's noticed immediately that they're not good enough for their sons ? June must have seen through her and was a good judge of character-------------which was proved.

[maggie]

If you don't like the intended spouse you voice opposition. They were not even living together at the time anyway.

If you don't like an intended spouse you should keep quiet and mind your beeswax, it's nothing to do with anyone who someone chooses to marry or live with imo but back in the early/mid 80s I can understand why June and Nevill struggled with Jeremy and Julie living openly together.  It was not accepted, certainly in a rural farming community such as Goldhangar.

[Jane]

If you don't like an intended spouse you should keep quiet and mind your beeswax, it's nothing to do with anyone who someone chooses to marry or live with imo but back in the early/mid 80s I can understand why June and Nevill struggled with Jeremy and Julie living openly together.  It was not accepted, certainly in a rural farming community such as Goldhangar.

Maggie, I couldn't agree more. The biggest mistakes I've ever made involved me doing those thing my parents had wanted me to do. As a result I learned that it's a damn sight easier to sort out one's OWN mistakes than the mistakes inflicted on one by trying to please others.

[scipio_usmc]

I guess here you're saying that YOU would voice opposition. They are many who would go no further than offering their best wishes and congratulations It isn't strictly any parent's business who their offspring marry. The parental choice of spouse probably isn't the one their offspring would choose.

No I am saying that mothers who don't like a spouse (and some fathers) will voice opposition.  ESPECIALLY a mother that everyone asserts was so outspoken and involved in what her kids were doing that she would tell them not to live in sin etc. A meddling mother is not going to be happy when one wants to marry someone they hate.

[maggie]

Maggie, I couldn't agree more. The biggest mistakes I've ever made involved me doing those thing my parents had wanted me to do. As a result I learned that it's a damn sight easier to sort out one's OWN mistakes than the mistakes inflicted on one by trying to please others.

We all have to learn by our mistakes in our own way and when did anyone ever listen to me anyway 

[lookout]

One daughter ignored my advice and sadly things went t1ts up. Her ex should have married his mother !

[maggie]

One daughter ignored my advice and sadly things went t1ts up. Her ex should have married his mother !

Could tell you a few tales Lookout but such is life.