Book Reviews - Murders/Suicide at WHF

[Nuala]

I'm not going to go to bed until you speak with me, keira. Your friendship is 10x as important to me as this website.......u've got my number.....

Cut the spin. How have you bypassed the bans, Mat?

[guest154]

Bypassed what? I haven't. Why won't you reply to a pm?

[Nuala]

Bypassed what? I haven't. Why won't you reply to a pm?

Why, when I try to ban you, Mat, do I get the following message:

An Error Has Occurred! The name of this ban (mat) already exists. Please choose a different name?

Your ban already exists, yet you are here, posting under Mat.

[guest154]

Why, when I try to ban you, Mat, do I get the following message:

An Error Has Occurred! The name of this ban (mat) already exists. Please choose a different name?

Your ban already exists, yet you are here, posting under Mat.

Are you really asking me to help you ban me, Keira? It's not a just ban. Me and Jackie weren't attacking each other - other than when I called her post disgusting and ridicoulous - and she said I told her to suck a horse on the other forum but i explained that wasn't me.

I don't like Jackie - but the way you've edited the posts makes it look like she was ripping me apart....she wasn't.


I'm leaving this post of yours so that we all can see how you goad Jackie.

[guest154]

I'm standing up for Jackie in that post! Not goading her. I am saying she didn't attack me. But you've banned her and made it look like her posts were an attack with the editing you've done.

How's that an attack on Jackie?


Maggie and Grahame saw the start of the topic, what about them? They'll say there was no attacks other than the ones I stated. What about Bridget she saw the whole thing? And Petey and Saga.

[Nuala]

I'm standing up for Jackie in that post! Not goading her. I am saying she didn't attack me. But you've banned her and made it look like her posts were an attack with the editing you've done.

How's that an attack on Jackie?


Maggie and Grahame saw the start of the topic, what about them? They'll say there was no attacks other than the ones I stated. What about Bridget she saw the whole thing? And Petey and Saga.

You're standing up for Jackie, right? Then why did you repeatedly report her posts?

They're in the mod log, Mat

[bloggs and son]

We have to remember that collin wrote a book from his point of view. That doesnt mean anything else. Sure he lost his boys but we have to remember he dumped Sheila. Sheilas parents are supposed to be the bad guys but quite simply they were the ones spending the money,trying to find support for sheila etc. Colin left sheila for someone else. Why is he treated as the holy grail if he cared anything for the sick mother of his children maybe he shouldnt have left her for another woman. Maybe he should have stuck around a bit longer. It so easy to blame other people but maybe he should have taken a bit more responsibility.

People handle grief in different ways. I believe Colin wrote the book because it was probably a release for him to be able to write about Sheila who he loved and who had his two lovely children. Of course he loved her and to suggest otherwise would be unfair. He just couldn't live with her. It was destroying them both to stay together.

[bloggs and son]

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxtowards another member tonight that have been deleted. If I had said half of what she said you lot, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx.


Personal attack and attack on mods mod'd

I think that is a bit unfair Mat? The moderators are the fairest mods I've ever seen on this forum.

[bloggs and son]

Mat and Jackie have been temp banned. I've had to spend half the night into the early hours moding their mutually abusive posts and trying to prevent war breaking out on the forum.

Good move Keira. Just childish the lot of them. The problem is they will all blame you now.

[Jane]

Morning Maggie

Another late night on the forum.

I wld suggest Nevill and June were spending money trying to repair the damage caused to Sheila by June's well documented bouts of mental illness and religious mania.  Adoptive parents getting the cheque book out for school fees, mental health professionals, properties, cars, travel etc does not imo indicate that the adoptive parents were able to provide a loving, supportive family home in which the adoptees could thrive.

At the end of the day Maggie adoption is an abberation.  It is the only relationship which demands intimacy whereby one party was neither born to it or chose to be in it.  Can you think of any other relationships constructed on this basis apart from an arranged marriage?

I do not see how Colin Caffell can in any way shape or form be held responsible for Sheila's mental illness.  By the time Sheila was one year of age she had been passed from pillar to post: birth mother to mentally ill adoptive mother to unknown caregiver whilst June was in hospital receiving treatment for her mental illness caused by her decision to adopt Sheila and then eventually back to June.  I would suggest this caused untold damage and was the root cause of Sheila's mental illness.  Sheila had behavioural problems at school and was expelled twice.  This in itself is highly unusual ie a privately educated female in the 60's/70's being expelled.  All of this took place way before Sheila met Colin.

It is a well known fact that the relationship between adoptive mother and adopted daughter is often a difficult one.  According to my counsellor it has something to do with the adopted daughter's loyalty to the birth mother and the continuity of the family line.  To illustrate this point, I was re-reading my copy of Kate Adie's autoboigraphy entitled 'The Kindness of Strangers' and noted that she had dedicated the book to her birth mother as well as taking her to Buckingham Palace to collect her OBE.  Perhaps her adoptive mother was deceased but why not dedicate the book to her?

Maggie I was wondering if I could borrow your copy of Colin's book .  I will of course send you a sae and return it promptly when finished.  Thanks.

I 'm aware you've probably gone on your hols, but I just wanted you to know I support 100% everything you've said.

[mertol22]

People handle grief in different ways. I believe Colin wrote the book because it was probably a release for him to be able to write about Sheila who he loved and who had his two lovely children. Of course he loved her and to suggest otherwise would be unfair. He just couldn't live with her. It was destroying them both to stay together.

nearly in bedford at a layby, i will check colins book but im sure he does say words to effect he could have done more its not fair to judge him on  these events there was very complex issues here .

[maggie]

egap, I didn't say I believed colin made Sheila mentally ill in any way. I just meant that he didbt behave brilliantly. He knew heiw vulnerable she waa abd yet he was unfaithful to her leaving her aline with the twins nd moving in with another woman. However, I do accept that iit isn't up to me or anyone else to judge other peoples behaviour in such a very difficult siituation.  Hope I didnt offend anyone truly close to Colin.

[bloggs and son]

egap, I didn't say I believed colin made Sheila mentally ill in any way. I just meant that he didbt behave brilliantly. He knew heiw vulnerable she waa abd yet he was unfaithful to her leaving her aline with the twins nd moving in with another woman. However, I do accept that iit isn't up to me or anyone else to judge other peoples behaviour in such a very difficult siituation.  Hope I didnt offend anyone truly close to Colin.

Hi Maggie. I suppose it was probably very difficult for him to know exactly what to do under those circumstances? It is always hard to know the best course of action with anyone who is mentally ill? I'm not sure even the experts know of any proven best course of treatment for it because schizophrenia is a difficult illness to treat anyway and there are so many variants depending on the circumstances of the patient? It is always easy to be wise after the event, especially when there are years distant from the event itself?

[maggie]

Hi Maggie. I suppose it was probably very difficult for him to know exactly what to do under those circumstances? It is always hard to know the best course of action with anyone who is mentally ill? I'm not sure even the experts know of any proven best course of treatment for it because schizophrenia is a difficult illness to treat anyway and there are so many variants depending on the circumstances of the patient? It is always easy to be wise after the event, especially when there are years distant from the event itself?

Tolly agree Grahame.... I was just being aukward last night. Cant imagine why!!!!

[guest154]

I think that is a bit unfair Mat? The moderators are the fairest mods I've ever seen on this forum.

You're right, Grahame. Was a bit unfair. We're all guilty of lashing out at a mod when we disagree with a decision.