I am just trying to recap as well.
So, Harvest time and a humble 24 year old farmer who loved fast cars, wine bars, restaurants and holidays decided i can't be bothered with this years harvest.
He had the pick of any woman in the world but decided that the way to get out of this years harvest work was to fall for the wicked witch of the east. She put a spell on him to make him carry out any desire she wished. To test if the spell worked, she told him to rob his own parents. To her amazement he did it, she now knew that she could sow the seeds for her major plan, a new life in Canada where she could become a teacher, casting spells over North American children.
On August the 7th after months of being manipulated by this evil, vicious white witch. This simple country farmer snapped. He looked out of the window and his blood boiled with rage......rabbits.....everywhere. There were so many of these pests with great big pointy teeth that he loaded up a full magazine of bullets and went outside to crush these vermin. Amazingly, after going outside, the white witches magic kicked in and all the rabbits disappeared. This devoted farmer went back inside, bid his family goodnight and went home to catch up on some beauty sleep.
The witch however, was hard at work. She had put a spell on this simple farmers sister and she had picked up the gun he had left out and was marching up and down the stairs singing 'The grand old Duke of York' at the top of her voice. Sadly her father was not a clever man, he had several successful businesses and was amazingly a magistrate but instead of disarming his daughter. He thought 'I know i will ring my son, he is the one to fix this!' Unfortunately our hero could not save the day and his sister killed everybody before turning the gun on herself.
The wicked witch of the East was not finished yet. She put spells on this simple farmers family and they all conspired against him. She put spells on the whole of Essex police force to conspire against him. She put a spell on the jury as well at his trial . To demonstrate her powers she even put a spell on the future home secretary to make sure that our hero would stay in prison forever.
The only question i have is how much would he have inherited if his master plan had worked her evil spell had not worked properly.
