Oscar Pistorius Gets Bail Over Reeva Killing

[guest7363]

Thanks Maggie, I went in off topic to bring an update on pistorius/Reeva case, if you have a look at my original post, then it gets linked to Bamber and JM which I found strange, the obsession with Bamber takes over I am afraid and I can see (not your fault) where Steph took offence to a certain poster because of what was said.  But as usual you have done a sterling job in Moderating Maggie, thanks Maggie.

[Stephanie]

I did not remove it because I believed it was a general comment NOT a comment aimed at anyone in particular.
However, if you want it removed I shall do so in this instance. 
I removed your earlier post which was identical with one I removed by another poster yesterday or the day before because it was a direct personal attack on another poster.  As stated before I did not believe the post you are complaining about was directed at you.

Reeva steenkamp did not marry Oscar Pistorius in prison. You may have believed Lookouts comment was in general and decided to leave it up for that reason and I cannot dispute your belief. However comments such as this are bigoted and prejudiced and should therefore allowed to be showed as such.

[maggie]

Thanks Maggie, I went in off topic to bring an update on pistorius/Reeva case, if you have a look at my original post, then it gets linked to Bamber and JM which I found strange, the obsession with Bamber takes over I am afraid and I can see (not your fault) where Steph took offence to a certain poster because of what was said.  But as usual you have done a sterling job in Moderating Maggie, thanks Maggie.

Thank you for your kind words, Justice. 
Must admit I cannot see what you mean about this thread getting linked to JB unless ngb has already dealt with it as I have only just come back on the forum and red your post.    Or maybe I'm being thick..... 

[maggie]

Reeva steenkamp did not marry Oscar Pistorius in prison. You may have believed Lookouts comment was in general and decided to leave it up for that reason and I cannot dispute your belief. However comments such as this are bigoted and prejudiced and should therefore allowed to be showed as such.

Every poster is entitled to post their own opinion on any subject being discussed on the forum, they are not entitled to make personal comments towards posters because they disagree with their opinion.

My objection to the posts I removed was that it was a personal attack on another poster and not for any other reason. 

[JackiePreece]

A close member of my family had a serious long term relationship with someone who had been in prison and was on many occasions violent towards her.  The police warned her that if she stayed with him he would very possibly kill her. but incredibly, she still went back to him.  Fortunately she eventually found the strength to walk away and she is safe and well now but for the 6 years she was with him none of her friends or family who knew about his behaviour could understand what on earth she was doing with him.   

Well if you decide to be involved with anyone with a violent past why would you expect that behaviour to continue

No excuses here especially women with children who end up with partners with a violent past

They must be desperate for a partner

[susan]

Well if you decide to be involved with anyone with a violent past why would you expect that behaviour to continue

No excuses here especially women with children who end up with partners with a violent past

They must be desperate for a partner

Jackie I think some women think they are the one to change a man and that is why they go into the relationship but sadly very rarely happens

[maggie]

Well if you decide to be involved with anyone with a violent past why would you expect that behaviour to continue

No excuses here especially women with children who end up with partners with a violent past

They must be desperate for a partner

Think there is a bit more to it than that, Jackie.    I was just saying we all make mistakes in our lives and many men who are violent are good at hiding their pasts.  They cover it up and play the victim, that is how they pull people in.  Unfortunately once you are holed it is very difficult to unhook yourself however hard you may try and ome people die because of it. 
I would guess if Oscar Pistorius is guilty he had quite a lot of ammunition to use to gain sympathy. 

[maggie]

Jackie I think some women think they are the one to change a man and that is why they go into the relationship but sadly very rarely happens

Exactly Susan but that doesn't mean that men can also get drawn into unsuitable relationships for various reason.

[susan]

Think there is a bit more to it than that, Jackie.    I was just saying we all make mistakes in our lives and many men who are violent are good at hiding their pasts.  They cover it up and play the victim, that is how they pull people in.  Unfortunately once you are holed it is very difficult to unhook yourself however hard you may try and ome people die because of it. 
I would guess if Oscar Pistorius is guilty he had quite a lot of ammunition to use to gain sympathy.

Maggie
I think many women think the man in question has changed and the reason they were violent is because they were provoked or misunderstood and women tend to believe that I think in the Oscar Pistorius case she would know about his short fuse but she would never have thought he was capable of killing her or she would not have been with him I think he could charm the birds out of the trees. I saw women handing him flowers outside Court his type always get sympathy from female admirers.

[maggie]

Maggie
I think many women think the man in question has changed and the reason they were violent is because they were provoked or misunderstood and women tend to believe that I think in the Oscar Pistorius case she would know about his short fuse but she would never have thought he was capable of killing her or she would not have been with him I think he could charm the birds out of the trees. I saw women handing him flowers outside Court his type always get sympathy from female admirers.

The fatal mistake is to believe that although they have done it t others they won't do it to you. Think men can get caught up as well but for different reasons and are capable of being mesmorised as well before someone shows their true colours.

[notsure]

The fatal mistake is to believe that although they have done it t others they won't do it to you. Think men can get caught up as well but for different reasons and are capable of being mesmorised as well before someone shows their true colours.

well said Maggie, it goes for both men and women.

i think for reeva it was probably a gradual thing learning about his anger problems. It wasnt going to be obvious in the honeymoon stage. Then theres a stage of perhaps thinking its just a blip. From what ive read reeva was starti ng to open up to her mum about his sometimes horrible ways but dont think for  a minute she would have considered him dangerous.

im not sure how i feel about women who have relationships with people inside prison ( not aimed at you steff as i know you met shbefore he went to prison) but personally i wouldnt dare start that kinda relationship. No way, i would never write to jb or any other prisoner eithef because even though i am interested i have this block that i wouldnt want to get involved.

i suppose some women should be admired for it especially if they believe in the prisoner is innocent.

[Jane]

well said Maggie, it goes for both men and women.

i think for reeva it was probably a gradual thing learning about his anger problems. It wasnt going to be obvious in the honeymoon stage. Then theres a stage of perhaps thinking its just a blip. From what ive read reeva was starti ng to open up to her mum about his sometimes horrible ways but dont think for  a minute she would have considered him dangerous.

im not sure how i feel about women who have relationships with people inside prison ( not aimed at you steff as i know you met shbefore he went to prison) but personally i wouldnt dare start that kinda relationship. No way, i would never write to jb or any other prisoner eithef because even though i am interested i have this block that i wouldnt want to get involved.

i suppose some women should be admired for it especially if they believe in the prisoner is innocent.

How many know, from the start, that the charming, well presented, well dressed person they've hooked up with is actually an alcoholic? It may take a while before the penny drops.

[maggie]

How many know, from the start, that the charming, well presented, well dressed person they've hooked up with is actually an alcoholic? It may take a while before the penny drops.

Or any other kind of drug addict, it's amazing how well hidden that can be but absolutely devastating and dangerous.. We have a misconception that an alcoholic or drug addict is a scruffy down and out but that is often far from the truth of the matter.

[lookout]

Ye Gods,how was I to know that Steph married in prison ?? I didn't,did I ? Nor was I referring to her or if I'd known this I wouldn't have said anything would I ?

Anyhow,I'm not walking on eggshells in case I inadvertantly blot my copy-book again 

Pity I hadn't taken up mind-reading !!

I was referring to beautiful women such as Reeva was,who KNEW that Pistorius had a history of violence as do other charmers who have beautiful women on their arms----------it's called insecurity and a fear of loss.

[Jane]

Ye Gods,how was I to know that Steph married in prison ?? I didn't,did I ? Nor was I referring to her or if I'd known this I wouldn't have said anything would I ?

Anyhow,I'm not walking on eggshells in case I inadvertantly blot my copy-book again 

Pity I hadn't taken up mind-reading !!

I was referring to beautiful women such as Reeva was,who KNEW that Pistorius had a history of violence as do other charmers who have beautiful women on their arms----------it's called insecurity and a fear of loss.

DID she know, though? He sure as hell wouldn't have told her that he'd been violent. Aggression can be caused by many things.