"I didn't mean to be horrible to Jeremy.."

[Steve_uk]

From Claire Powell's Murder at White House Farm:

"She was quite hard to cope with those last few months. I knew she wasn't well and there was something about her that was a bit strange" recalled Sonja. "One day in the park she said to me", "I have been ill, you know. I went to the country to recover and they sent me to a hospital to get better." She was angry at her parents' attitude towards her."

Sheila resented her mother's simplistic approach to the psychological crisis she had undergone. "My mother thinks my difficulties can all be solved with this remedy or that remedy, just like taking medicine" she complained. "It's as if I was a problem that could be easily solved by being sent here or there. She doesn't want to listen to anything else."

[Steve_uk]

Sheila's friends felt the young woman had changed greatly during the first six months of 1985. Gone was the anxious, sweet personality and in its place was a driven, tormented creature.  A friend described her state of mind: "At that point she was even more distant than usual. She seemed as if she had been very ill. She was quite frail and I realized that the illness she had talked about was some sort of mental trouble. I remember she called me again about a month before she died. She wanted to see me and I was busy. Then, after the murders, I felt so guilty, of course. She had wanted to talk to me and I hadn't had time for her."

[lookout]

That was the whole problem,Steve,NOBODY had time for her,not even the father of her children. She really would have felt abandoned and how on earth she felt towards the end is anyone's guess,extremely desperate I'd have said.

[Steve_uk]

That was the whole problem,Steve,NOBODY had time for her,not even the father of her children. She really would have felt abandoned and how on earth she felt towards the end is anyone's guess,extremely desperate I'd have said.

I agree lookout, and many people would have snapped long before Sheila. But I still think she had remnants of the person she was intrinsically, with a natural, trusting disposition, even if she abused the only person who really did understand her and drove him away: Colin.

[Jane]

I agree lookout, and many people would have snapped long before Sheila. But I still think she had remnants of the person she was intrinsically, with a natural, trusting disposition, even if she abused the only person who really did understand her and drove him away: Colin.

I weary of hearing what a terrible husband Colin was. It's good to know you have some sympathy for him. OK, in a perfect world, they'd have lived happily ever after, but in a perfect world, if he'd kept his trousers done up, there'd have been no reason for them to have been together. Sheila was too insecure to have been content -she was looking for someone to make things right for her. She probably thought everything would be fine if only..........- and I don't believe any man could have put up with her insecurities long term. I imagine their marriage, for Colin, was probably at its best when it was over.

[Steve_uk]

I weary of hearing what a terrible husband Colin was. It's good to know you have some sympathy for him. OK, in a perfect world, they'd have lived happily ever after, but in a perfect world, if he'd kept his trousers done up, there'd have been no reason for them to have been together. Sheila was too insecure to have been content -she was looking for someone to make things right for her. She probably thought everything would be fine if only..........- and I don't believe any man could have put up with her insecurities long term. I imagine their marriage, for Colin, was probably at its best when it was over.

Yes I think they were happiest together walking across Paddington Recreation Ground keeping an eye on Nicholas and Daniel as they played on the swings. Once out of the public gaze Sheila would start her deep conversations about the meaning of life which went over the heads of both Colin and Jeremy. Sheila was looking for a rich man who would dote on her, but she wasn't as promiscuous as has been assumed. I agree she was far too fragile to play the field and constantly had to be reassured by the Maida Vale set that she still could fall back on her looks, hence the raunchy photograph shoot, which she immediately realized was a mistake.

[Jane]

Yes I think they were happiest together walking across Paddington Recreation Ground keeping an eye on Nicholas and Daniel as they played on the swings. Once out of the public gaze Sheila would start her deep conversations about the meaning of life which went over the heads of both Colin and Jeremy. Sheila was looking for a rich man who would dote on her, but she wasn't as promiscuous as has been assumed. I agree she was far too fragile to play the field and constantly had to be reassured by the Maida Vale set that she still could fall back on her looks, hence the raunchy photograph shoot, which she immediately realized was a mistake.

On an intellectual level she knew she was stunning because everyone told her she was -I know someone who came within a whisper of calling his wedding off so he could be with her. He came to his senses. A friend longed to date her. He's now happily married- however, on an psychological level she didn't believe in herself because I guess she'd never felt good enough, and needed constant reassurance. Maybe she only ever saw the woman who looked back at her from the pictures. The raunchy ones would probably have confirmed all the flaws June had accused her of having.

[Steve_uk]

On an intellectual level she knew she was stunning because everyone told her she was -I know someone who came within a whisper of calling his wedding off so he could be with her. He came to his senses. A friend longed to date her. He's now happily married- however, on an psychological level she didn't believe in herself because I guess she'd never felt good enough, and needed constant reassurance. Maybe she only ever saw the woman who looked back at her from the pictures. The raunchy ones would probably have confirmed all the flaws June had accused her of having.

"She did it strictly to get money. I think it all went back to Bambi's uneasy relationship with her parents" claimed a friend. "I think she felt her father in particular was disappointed in her. Not angry, just disappointed that she hadn't done more with her life. He wanted her to make something of herself. I think that's why she was so keen on trying to get a job-apart from the fact that she had no money-it was to show her father she was managing."

The Maida Vale photographic shoot marked a significant decline in Sheila's fortunes and in her morale. The former model who had been sent to boarding school and an expensive Swiss Cottage college was forced to take on cleaning jobs to earn extra cash. The happy atmosphere of Moreshead Mansions disintegrated as Sheila's emotional stability began to crumble.

The beginning of 1985 saw Sheila slipping back into that twilight world of nervous tension and paranoia which had immersed her two years previously. Her temper was erratic and she began to have violent outbursts, screaming so loudly that other residents were woken up by the noise. Her nearest neighbour rushed to help, but found Sheila alone apart from the twins and clearly distraught, shouting and screaming.

[David1819]

On an intellectual level she knew she was stunning because everyone told her she was -I know someone who came within a whisper of calling his wedding off so he could be with her.

So she was prepared to fall into the arms of a man engaged to another woman? Interesting.

[Samson]

So she was prepared to fall into the arms of a man engaged to another woman? Interesting.

I guess it could be construed as a revenge killing because Colin dumped her.

[Jane]

So she was prepared to fall into the arms of a man engaged to another woman? Interesting.

Oh David! There's a whole background behind that story. She was only 16 and knowing the guy concerned, it's highly unlikely that he told her of his impending marriage!!! He had the hots for her, big time, but the consequence of "having the hots" was the prime reason for his forthcoming nuptials He reasoned that she'd probably be high maintenance and described her as being "flaky".

[lookout]

I guess it could be construed as a revenge killing because Colin dumped her.

That would have been a part of it,yes. Much has been said about JM's " out-pourings " because JB had dumped her. A woman scorned is a very wild animal.

[Jane]

I guess it could be construed as a revenge killing because Colin dumped her.

Then why not kill Colin?

[maggie]

Sheila's friends felt the young woman had changed greatly during the first six months of 1985. Gone was the anxious, sweet personality and in its place was a driven, tormented creature.  A friend described her state of mind: "At that point she was even more distant than usual. She seemed as if she had been very ill. She was quite frail and I realized that the illness she had talked about was some sort of mental trouble. I remember she called me again about a month before she died. She wanted to see me and I was busy. Then, after the murders, I felt so guilty, of course. She had wanted to talk to me and I hadn't had time for her."

I wonder if the noticeable change in Sheila's personality stated by her friend had a connection to her high dose of Haldol?  Such drugs have effects on psychological coping skills as well as possible physical skills.
Who knows how much June understood Sheila's plight?  We certainly get the impression that June wasn't good at communicating on an emotional level and seemed to show her love in a practical way of providing food and financial support.
On the other hand we do get the impression that Sheila was very emotionally insecure and desperately needed the emotional connection her mother couldn't give.
I would guess there was a breakdown in understanding between the two women but in all fairness that doesn't prove a lack of love on either side, the best of mother daughter relationships are often loving but complex.
Think the young woman expressing her guilt after Sheila's death for being 'too busy' to speak to her is simply expressing a commonly felt reaction to sudden death and doesn't prove that no one bothered with her.  We have to be aware that although we know in hindsight how ill Sheila had been it seems many of her friends/aquaintances were not aware.
Paranoid Schizophrenia and its medication is a very difficult and isolating medical condition, my heart goes out to Sheila but because of her trauma, anxiety, heavy medication etc. she possibly was difficult for people to relate to which would have compounded her isolation.
 

[Jane]

I wonder if the noticeable change in Sheila's personality stated by her friend had a connection to her high dose of Haldol?  Such drugs have effects on psychological coping skills as well as possible physical skills.
Who knows how much June understood Sheila's plight?  We certainly get the impression that June wasn't good at communicating on an emotional level and seemed to show her love in a practical way of providing food and financial support.
On the other hand we do get the impression that Sheila was very emotionally insecure and desperately needed the emotional connection her mother couldn't give.
I would guess there was a breakdown in understanding between the two women but in all fairness that doesn't prove a lack of love on either side, the best of mother daughter relationships are often loving but complex.
Think the young woman expressing her guilt after Sheila's death for being 'too busy' to speak to her is simply expressing a commonly felt reaction to sudden death and doesn't prove that no one bothered with her.  We have to be aware that although we know in hindsight how ill Sheila had been it seems many of her friends/aquaintances were not aware.
Paranoid Schizophrenia and its medication is a very difficult and isolating medical condition, my heart goes out to Sheila but because of her trauma, anxiety, heavy medication etc. she possibly was difficult for people to relate to which would have compounded her isolation.

FAULTLESS, Maggie! Brilliant post.