Andrea

[Janet]

Prove you are not what I said you were by supporting those who are the victims of cyber bullying. If none of you do then we will see who are the ones who have credibilty. I'll tell you one thing for free they will damn well be interested if it were them and Andrea's comments to Jackie prove that. You are the ones who are being unsupportive. But never mind. Just carry on with your own selfish lives.

I think you have been very unfair towards me. I am agreeing with you yet see above. you quoted me so I assume you are replying to me.

I do not and have never condoned bullying in any shape or form and never will.

[mertol22]

Jail terms could be on the line here you do not walk away Jackie is a woman they would not dare say these sordid things to a man, vile cowards the sooner the site he has is smashed up the better, i  support jackie through and through.

[Nuala]

I think you have been very unfair towards me. I am agreeing with you yet see above. you quoted me so I assume you are replying to me.

I do not and have never condoned bullying in any shape or form and never will.

Very respectfully, Grahame, I do think you are being a bit hard on Janet. Jackie knows that Janet supports her against the abusers. Jackie does not want Janet to leave. Nor do you, Grahame xxx.
Not do any of us. We want Janet to stay. Different people express their support in different ways, that's all. Please stay, Janet! xxx

[grahameb]

I think you have been very unfair towards me. I am agreeing with you yet see above. you quoted me so I assume you are replying to me.

I do not and have never condoned bullying in any shape or form and never will.

I apologise Janet.

[grahameb]

I apologise Janet.

I was unfair to Petey as well. I am sorry.

[Roch]

I think the solution should be dealt with privately but thats only my opinion

This actually is the solution.  If there was a locked private section for disputes and grievances, for which only established members could join up to (i.e. not lurkers)... then this would allow for such matters to be aired in private and not interfere with the open forum.  Ideally, the new posts in any such facility would not become visible on the rolling 'most recent posts' bit at the bottom of the screen. 

There would then be absolutely no mention of the other forum, upon the open forum.  And nobody lurking from the other forum could view any of the grievances being discussed, which would put a halt to the daily shuttle service from here to there, which everyone is pissed off about.

I'm not sure if SMF allows for this kind of locked private facility?

[ngb1066]

This actually is the solution.  If there was a locked private section for disputes and grievances, for which only established members could join up to (i.e. not lurkers)... then this would allow for such matters to be aired in private and not interfere with the open forum.  Ideally, the new posts in any such facility would not become visible on the rolling 'most recent posts' bit at the bottom of the screen. 

There would then be absolutely no mention of the other forum, upon the open forum.  And nobody lurking from the other forum could view any of the grievances being discussed, which would put a halt to the daily shuttle service from here to there, which everyone is pissed off about.

I'm not sure if SMF allows for this kind of locked private facility?

That is a very good suggestion David.  We will have a look and see if it can be done.

[grahameb]

This actually is the solution.  If there was a locked private section for disputes and grievances, for which only established members could join up to (i.e. not lurkers)... then this would allow for such matters to be aired in private and not interfere with the open forum.  Ideally, the new posts in any such facility would not become visible on the rolling 'most recent posts' bit at the bottom of the screen. 

There would then be absolutely no mention of the other forum, upon the open forum.  And nobody lurking from the other forum could view any of the grievances being discussed, which would put a halt to the daily shuttle service from here to there, which everyone is pissed off about.

I'm not sure if SMF allows for this kind of locked private facility?

I actually disagree with you there Roch. I think these people ought to be exposed and shown up for what they are. We must not give the impression that they are untouchable and that we are shrinking violets.

[grahameb]

I also believe that every member of this forum should be prepared to show their open support for any other persecuted member who has been or is currently exposed to these cowardly attacks. You cannot break a chain as easily as you can a rope.

[ngb1066]

I actually disagree with you there Roch. I think these people ought to be exposed and shown up for what they are. We must not give the impression that they are untouchable and that we are shrinking violets.

Grahame  - I entirely agree that they should be exposed and should face the consequences of their actions.  However I think what Rochford is suggesting is that any disputes on this forum should be aired in a private section.

[petey]

I was unfair to Petey as well. I am sorry.

no worries. Thanks

[grahameb]

Grahame  - I entirely agree that they should be exposed and should face the consequences of their actions.  However I think what Rochford is suggesting is that any disputes on this forum should be aired in a private section.

With all due respects Neil these so called internal disputes have far reaching consequences. I support Jackie and I also support Andrea against Jackie. But then to be fair Andrea now knows what it is like to be the object of abuse, however unjust that might appear towards Andrea. I also contend (and this was the whole object of my argument) that folk will never know what it is like until it happens to them personally as Andrea found out to her cost.
I also contend that to actively take part in that disgusting forum even if they are not actively partaking of the abuse is to acknowledge that the other forum has some kind of value and that those who frequent that place are to my mind responsible for its continuation and this in turn gives that place the nod of appreciation.
In turn this also causes suspicion to fall upon those who are active members of that forum and encourages others to doubt their integrity. Andrea has found this out to her cost. Because it is not only Jackie who is suspicious of her but several other members of this forum.
So you see it is not that simple to just keep these disputes private. Because all of these points impinge upon this whole forum.

[Roch]

grahame, it comes down to the 'starve them of oxygen' approach. 

Support would / could be given to forum members, in the proposed private section.  Since all established members of the forum would have access to that section, anyone who genuinely needed to know about such abuse, would indeed find out about it.

Think about it.  Counter actions would be discussed in private, instead of vague or knee-jerk threats being issued on the open forum.

The overriding advantage is that none of this would interfere with the open forum.  Interference with the open forum is the very aim of those seeking to attack the members you /or I wish to support. 

[Roch]

That is a very good suggestion David.  We will have a look and see if it can be done.

Thanks.  Grahame's views aside, it would still be worth knowing what alternative options smf can offer?

Grahame, I don't think we can dictate who does or does not look at or post upon the other forum.  People like abs will simply tell you where to go.  Nobody like being told what to do... least of all me  :D

[grahameb]

grahame, it comes down to the 'starve them of oxygen' approach. 

Support would / could be given to forum members, in the proposed private section.  Since all established members of the forum would have access to that section, anyone who genuinely needed to know about such abuse, would indeed find out about it.

Think about it.  Counter actions would be discussed in private, instead of vague or knee-jerk threats being issued on the open forum.

The overriding advantage is that none of this would interfere with the open forum.  Interference with the open forum is the very aim of those seeking to attack the members you /or I wish to support.

Roch. I've looked at how different forums can be made private. But I need someone who is more technically minded than I am.