The facts leading up to & following the Simon Hall confession

[Stephanie]

Relationships with Borderline Personality Disordered

"Those suffering with borderline personality disorder (BPD) have a proclivity for unstable interpersonal relationships. These individuals are unable to tolerate being alone due to their abandonment anxiety. They also experience severe anger and frequently undermine their significant others. Those with BPD commonly mask their dependency and manipulation. An unstable sense of self is characteristic of the disorder, along with impulsiveness and demanding behavior.
Substance abuse and promiscuity are also common, and may be connected. Researchers have found that BPD symptoms and diagnosis successfully predict dating satisfaction and stress, adolescents’ conflict with romantic partners, domestic violence, and separation and divorce.
Typically individuals with BPD have difficulty trusting others. Irritability and inappropriate anger with temper tantrums may occur. The symptoms of BPD may resemble love addiction. While love addiction is not medically diagnosable, addictive behavior is difficult to live with. Relationships build quickly and intensely. They are unable to see the faults of their partner, and cannot tolerate changes in intimacy. Because their partner will eventually disappoint them, the person with BPD must reconcile their black and white conceptualization. Splitting shields those with the disorder from the anxiety of conflicting emotions.
One study found that those with BPD have a distorted sense of social norms, which impacts their ability to trust or cooperate. When something goes wrong in their relationships, they do not respond in a manner that would repair the damage. By doing so, they limit others from being able to fully cooperate in return.
Frequently these individuals are unable to focus on the feelings of others because their own emotional pain is too great an obstacle. Research has evidenced that women diagnosed with BPD display problematic sexual behaviors and patterns of unstable love relationships. Sexuality is frequently used to avoid the chronic feelings of emptiness experienced by those with the disorder. It may also be used to temper the anxiety felt surrounding perceived abandonment.
Individuals with BPD may feel that their emotional needs are not met in a relationship, but they do not have the capacity to assert their emotional needs in a productive and healthy manner. When they do not get what they want or need from the relationship, frustrations arise. Because of the intense fear of loneliness and abandonment, when the relationship is viewed as at risk these individuals may feel extreme anger.
Those suffering with BPD do not have the skills to manage their rage. Because of this, they may physically lash out at their partner. Studies have found that BPD is related to intimate partner aggression, including physical, emotional and sexual aggression.
Overall, those with BPD have intense and unstable relationships. Commonly they view people as all good or all bad, and in a relationship this perspective is used to devalue their partners. They do not want to be abandoned, however, so manipulation and control are used to prevent their partners from leaving.
Men who suffer from BPD may be emotionally volatile. Anger, jealousy and depression are typical of these men. They may be physically aggressive when they believe that a social or emotional distance exists between them and their female partners.
Studies of lesbian abusers found similar dichotomous thinking and feeling patterns. In these relationships, violence was used when they felt their partners were becoming emotionally distant or when physical separation was threatened. Furthermore, women with borderline personality disorder may be at a greater risk of using interpersonal physical aggression than those without the disorder.
Counseling is vital, and couples may wish to seek their own therapists who practice dialectical behavior and other forms of therapy. Seeing therapists separately is important so that each individual can work on their own issues before working on the relationship. Skilled therapists who specialize in working with BPD individuals will be better able to offer help.
Treatment for borderline personality disorder may include hospitalization, medication, substance abuse treatment and psychotherapy. Support groups for the loved ones of individuals with BPD may also be helpful. Like others, individuals suffering with BPD seek acceptance, forgiveness and reconciliation. Because of childhood trauma histories experienced by many with the disorder, it is important for the patient to be able to collaborate emotionally and therapeutically so they may tell their story.

http://www.borderline-personality-disorder.com/relationships/

[Stephanie]

"People with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) often have trouble relating to other people, causing instability in their interpersonal relationships. If you have BPD, you may feel as though you need to secure extra assurance from others to help you maintain your relationships, which can result in the impulse to lie.

Compulsive lying, or mythomania, can be common in people with Borderline Personality Disorder. This is because people with BPD are often very afraid of abandonment and disapproval, and will do whatever it takes to make sure neither of those things happens.

If you have Borderline Personality Disorder and have been at fault, perhaps for a car accident or mishap at work, you may have tried to pass the buck or rationalize the mistake while you are desperately trying to avoid being viewed in a negative light.

Many Shades of Lies
Manipulation can take many forms. You might think of compulsive lying as the fabrication of elaborate stories that are easily debunked and taken to be ridiculous among peers. However, compulsive liars can be much more subtle and trickier to figure out.

If you have Borderline Personality Disorder with a habit of lying, you may have found that others have lost their trust in you by degrees instead of after one particular incident of dishonesty.

Some forms of lying prevalent in people with BPD include the following:

Faking a medical condition in order to reduce responsibility
Carrying on close personal or romantic relationships strictly for personal gain
Blaming tardiness on children, a faulty car, or other fictitious circumstances
Contributing imaginary information to a friendly conversation
Avoiding embarrassment by giving incorrect but convenient answers to simple questions (for example, telling someone you parked in the lot they told you about when in fact you couldn’t find the lot or forgot about it)
It’s All in Your Brain
The tendency to compulsively lie may be attributed to the structure of your brain. A recent study conducted at the University of Southern California (USC) shows that if you have a history of lying, your brain might actually be structured differently than that of a person who is generally honest.

White matter in the prefrontal cortex (the front part of your brain) is responsible for masterminding a lie, which includes weighing how the other party will respond and suppressing your own emotions to limit or eliminate the appearance of nervousness. Gray matter is the substance that curbs the impulse to lie to make things easier and holds people to their principles.

In the USC study, compulsive liars showed a higher percentage of white matter and a deficit of gray matter.

Is Honesty the Best Policy?
We uphold myths of George Washington confessing to chopping down the cherry tree and Abraham Lincoln walking miles to return something that didn’t belong to him as symbols of our cultural principles. While it is true that very few people go through life being completely honest —  and there are times when a fib can save lives or help children cope through difficult times — compulsive lying can ruin your career, relationships, sense of well-being, and self-esteem.

The key is to learn to tolerate the stress that being honest can bring on, particularly the uncertainty of whether the other person will still like you if you confess to the truth. For people with Borderline Personality Disorder, these are skills that can be worked on in therapy, especially with Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), which strengthens these very abilities.

http://www.borderlinepersonalitytreatment.com/bpd-treatment-compulsive-lying.html

[Stephanie]

Following the death of SH, it was suggested by a Forensic Psychologist (Who was given access to all of SH's prison files, interviewed prison staff and also obtained information from the WWW/internet) that he may have had a Borderline Personality Disorder?

However the conclusion of the Inquest held in June 2016 suggested SH did not have mental health issues nor did he have a personality disorder?

Relationships with Borderline Personality Disordered

"Those suffering with borderline personality disorder (BPD) have a proclivity for unstable interpersonal relationships. These individuals are unable to tolerate being alone due to their abandonment anxiety. They also experience severe anger and frequently undermine their significant others. Those with BPD commonly mask their dependency and manipulation. An unstable sense of self is characteristic of the disorder, along with impulsiveness and demanding behavior.
Substance abuse and promiscuity are also common, and may be connected. Researchers have found that BPD symptoms and diagnosis successfully predict dating satisfaction and stress, adolescents’ conflict with romantic partners, domestic violence, and separation and divorce.
Typically individuals with BPD have difficulty trusting others. Irritability and inappropriate anger with temper tantrums may occur.

http://www.borderline-personality-disorder.com/relationships/

The HCR-20 risk assessment guide was used to assess SH's risk of violence and in order to help formulate his case. The HCR-20 is a guide to risk assessment and in not a formal psychological test but an example structured professional judgment approach to violence risk assessment. Structured professional guidelines are designed to assist the process of risk assessment and management by requiring those undertaking assessments to consider at least a minimum set of risk factors regarded as important in the scientific and professional literature (Hart et al, 2003).

The HCR-20 requires evaluators to consider ten historical factors such as onset and severity of violence, lifestyle instability, mental and personality disorder diagnosis, including substance use problems and psychopathy. In addition, five current clinical factors are considered (e.g. insight, impulsivity, attitudes supportive of crime and violence) and five risk management items (e.g. feasibilty of future plans, availability of social support, stress vulnerability and coping skills).

Each item has been considered and coded as either 'definate/serious', 'possible/less serious' or 'not present.' Where there is insufficient evidence with which to code an item, such as a lack of formal assessment, an item may be 'omitted.'

Following SH's confession in July 2013 a Psychological Risk Assessment (HCR-20) was carried out by a Forensic Psychologist (FP) who had access to a range of documentation: previous psychological reports, offending behaviour post-programme reports (CALM and PASR-O), probation reports and psychiatric reports.

The FP also discussed SH with prison staff from Hollesley Bay and Wayland prisons and interviewed SH on several occasions.

In his November 2013 report summary, the FP states this section is drawn from the documented information he has had access to and also information provided to him by SH, it states:

In relation to item "Lack of Insight" SH states to the FP - He has some recognition that he can be 'cold' and 'thoughtless', 'detached' and 'disinterested' in others.

The FP states in his report that SH demonstrates that the item "Lack of Insight" is partially/possibly present.

With regard to the item 'Relationship Instability' he has shown the capacity to form relationships, although these have been characterised by infidelities and in one case of domestic violence (When he slapped his partner). He has not shown - and this may be a function of the young age at which he was engaging in these relationships - a capacity to sustain relationships. For example, his relationships have typically lasted for periods of 4-7 months. His 'relationships' have also included a series of exclusively sexual encounters with men. These contacts, he state, typically occurred at pubs and clubs and in prison (on remand and at HMP Dovegate). He also accessed gay chat-lines via which he met with, and had casual sex with men.

The item 'Relationship Instability' therefore has been coded as 'possibly present,' taking into account of his capacity to form and sustain relationships, rather than showing no experience of relationship skills at all.

The item 'major mental illness' is coded as 'possibly present'. Note: The information used to obtain this summary appears to have been taken from a pre-trial psychology report.

Mr Hall has not been assessed using the Psychopathy Check List-Revised (PCL-R; R, Hare, 2000). Therefore the item 'psychopathy' is currently 'omitted.'

The item 'personality disorder' has been 'omitted' at this stage. Mr Hall has had no diagnosis or assessment by psychiatry or psychology for personality disorder.

The report then goes on to state:

There is no evidence to suggest that Mr Hall has experienced 'active symptoms of major mental illness' in the past 12-18 months and therefore this item is coded 'not present.'

[Stephanie]

Excerpts from letter dated August 2013:

"I hate being alone. I hate the thought of having no-one to love and no-one to love me. To admit what I've done, I believed I would be forever lonely. Who could love someone who murdered a defenceless old lady? No-one could. Fifteen minutes of my life, but in that time I destroyed it all.

Excerpt from another letter dated August 2013:

"One of the books I'm reading is called Breaking Free and it's really helpful. It explains a lot of the things I've been going through and panicking about. There's some good advice about dealing with some of my problems...

"It's painful knowing I've killed another person. Someone fragile and vulnerable. Completely innocent and nothing to do with my anger, my emotions, or my childhood....

http://www.bloomsbury.com/uk/they-f-you-up-9781408821336/

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=breaking+free+book&oq=breaking+free+book+&aqs=chrome..69i57j0l5.5430j0j1&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8

Following SH's confession someone wrote to him in November 2013.

Here are a couple of para's from the letter...

"Simon, disgusted, appaulled, sickened, gut wrenched all of the afore mentioned, just don't know what a little old lady could have possibly done to warrant you taking her life, even worse to lie for all those years prolonging the families agony, cruel to say the least, callous and sick to the core.

I hope you get the help you so desperately, not only for taking a life and being sick enough to deny it for so long whilst callously ignoring the consequences of your actions on many many others, but for the compulsive lying, for the fairy tales you have told everybody and the nasty games you have played.

So you get some help, work hard at it, learn some remorse, learn how important family and friends are, how to be a decent man, a productive member of society, learn an eye for an eye, that you deserve every single minute of the time you have served and some. And while your doing all of this remember the pain you have caused to your victims family.

Ask for forgiveness and most of all be a better person.


Within a week or so of sending the above the person in question goes on to write in a different vein. Gone are the thoughts that the person they are writing to (SH) has deceived them and has murdered, instead they appear to have forgiven and forgotten these facts?

How was SH able to exploit the above person within a week?

Were they exploited?

Did the fact SH had murdered and then confessed over a decade later appeal to them more?

What motivates people to write to convicted murderers?

[Stephanie]

Just because SH committed murder does not make him ill or abnormal.

According to a court hearing in 2003. SH was anxious about the situation of being a suspect.

"He had voiced anxiety before arrest that he might be suspected of the murder.  The Crown presented this as indicative of guilt."

Where did the information come from with regards SH voicing anxiety before his arrest? Who was the source?

Prior to his court hearing, he was assessed by a forensic psychologist (FP). She concluded, if found guilty it was likely he had a dissocial personality disorder (Aka Antisocial PD)

However David, the various sources the FP used in order to draw her conclusions were either inaccurate, false or misleading. There was very little factual information contained in the various documents she had access to. And during the numerous meetings she had with SH, he lied to her.

The FP did not assess SH in relation to the factual disclosures which were his confession (2013) because SH maintained he was innocent, plus the FP assessment was based on a burglary gone wrong motive. 

What are your conclusions with regards SH? If he wasn't ill or abnormal, what was he? What type of person commits the type of crime he did?

Here

http://webarchive.nationalarchives.gov.uk/20110218200720/http:/www.hmcourts-service.gov.uk/cms/144_10267.htm

I would say the most plausible motive would be burglary gone wrong. The decision to commit the murder was probably a split second (fight or flight) scenario. The victim could identify him plus she was old and weak. Thus eliminating was victim was a primitive response a short sighted solution to the problem.

As for his continual protests of innocence. I am under the impression his parents/family assumed his innocence and flat out denied it was possible without ever asking him or talking to him about it (correct me if I am wrong). This would only have encouraged him to deny the murder. If I was in such situation I can imagine my parents cross examining me and telling me to be honest because I wont get away with it. 

As for SH personally I cannot really comment. I never met him.

Hi David,

I asked "Who was the source?" Not where did you get it from.

I've already posted on this thread some of the details regarding SH's confession and indeed regarding his mother.

By all means stick with your belief of the most plausible motive, but all you are doing is putting out misinformation, instead of facts. Not dissimilar to what you are doing in the Bamber case.

[lookout]

I agree with what David said----well put.

[Stephanie]

I agree with what David said----well put.

By all means continue to attempt to goad me Lookout but in the process you are doing Jeremy Bambers cause no good at all!

Agree with David all you like but it wont change the facts!

[Stephanie]

"It's painful knowing I've killed another person. Someone fragile and vulnerable. Completely innocent and nothing to do with my anger, my emotions, or my childhood....

What was SH so angry about?

And how does anger build up inside a person to such a degree that they choose to murder?

[Stephanie]

Today marks the 15th Anniversary that SH murdered and ended the life of an innocent, vulnerable and elderly lady. RIP

[Stephanie]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-12195159

There was an interview (Above) SH's mother gave to the BBC following his conviction being upheld on appeal in Jan 2011. I was annoyed with her interview because she lied. She lied that she was in contact with SH's legal team, and that they would carry on the fight. She wasn't fighting. She had done nothing for years!

At the time my bias (And other distractions) stopped me from seeing SH's guilt. My focus was on his mother but for the wrong reasons. It was all there but others failed to pick up on it also.
http://jeremybamberforum.co.uk/index.php/topic,6736.msg379407.html#msg379407

Her life wasn't on hold as far as I was aware. Her and her husband would have several holidays a year and carried on regardless. I have letters that back this up also.

She mentions talking to family and friends for help? No family member or friend for that matter ever bothered contacting SH in the time I knew him!

Her interviews always bothered me.

There was another interview she did for the Rough Justice documentary and that too is telling. She talks about how "all the girls would pick SH up when he was younger?" I could never get my head around what she meant by this comment and what her motive was for saying it in the first place?

[Steve_uk]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-12195159

I wonder if she's ever met Trudi Benjamin..

[Stephanie]

I wonder if she's ever met Trudi Benjamin..

No idea?

I'd like to meet Trudi Benjamin to help her see reason. She's doing Bambers bidding, just as I did for SH.

I'm going to post an email sent from SH to his mother, via me.

It's very telling. Though at the time I was convinced of his innocence.

I was attacked by both his father (He called me an 'evil bitch?') and brother for having sent it and was told his mother would not see it? I was also threatened with legal action and was told copies would be sent to Dr Michael Naughton and Michael Mansfield QC? Not sure exactly what they would have been able to do?

I couldn't understand where all their anger was coming from? His father wrote to him off the back of it. I have the original letter (Which SH sent to me at the time)

The whole family attempted to publicly blame and shame me for SH's blogs. But as has been proven, they were SH's words, all dictated to me via a recorded prison telephone.



10th February 2013


Mother,

You are fu**ed up, you either don't know it or you do know it and deny it, but look how you have behaved and treated me and the women that I love. Look how you attempted to humiliate us in the past and have offered us no support whatever.

Hang your head in shame. The truth is we are too good for you but because you are fu**ed up you will never see it. Instead you spread your pitiful misery on other people and one by one they gang up on whoever you have got in your sights, because they are too weak minded to see through your tears, your plotting and your lies. It's disgraceful.

Prison has changed me and I am not the Simon that you knew or who I once was. I stand by what I wrote to you years ago, not long after I got married. After I kicked the heroin, reality sunk in that my best interests weren't your first thought, back to appearances as usual.

Before prison I never stood up to you but you brought me up in that way. Whenever I tried to answer back, I'd be met with your tears or the back of Dads slipper. You know that hitting kids is considered child abuse don't you? But what about the mental abuse? Your constant reminders of what you couldn't have because you spent money on me and Shaun, for example. Your constant guilt trips and how things would be different if you had adopted the girl you always wanted. The list goes on, I've never forgotten that you used it all for control, because you are a control freak and you did it so that I would forever feel like I owed you for adopting me. That stopped years ago, sitting in a shitty prison cell saw to that.

I am in control and it pisses you off that I see through you. I see through you all. It pisses you off also that you can't control my wife, so she is a threat to you. In your mind Stephanie has taken your son away from you and you hate it. In reality you pushed me away. You have said that I am brainwashed. It that because I stopped doing what you tried programming me to do and that I think for myself and make my own decisions? It is not what you wanted though is it.?

Respect needs to be earned and for many years I have had none for you, it has all gone.

You tried turning me into a victim and a sympathy chaser, because that is what you are and the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. So that's how I used to get by, never taking control. My drugs course and the support of others changed that. Changed me.

I have been doing what is best for me.

Dad, you are fu**ed up too. I openly respected you for many years but I don't respect you anymore. You've allowed yourself to be bullied by Mum and you never, as far as I could see, stuck up for yourself. To me, you just suffered in silence. Well guess what I used to do? I used to do the same because that's what I had as the example. I had no father figure, you taught me nothing. How much did we talk? I mean really talk. We didn't. All those uncomfortable silences and excuses to get out of the room. Was I an embarrassment to you? Where were you Dad?

You have never believed in me, your son.

Shaun, you are just the same. You are fu**ed up. You have openly admitted to the public that you have done fu*k all to help me and that you are fu**ed up. How many times did you write, or visit, or ask to visit, or even care? So how the fu*k can you have the audacity to say anything about me or my wife. Stephanie has done more for me in the last 5 years than you have done in the last 35 years.

We are blood you and me but you are not my brother. I am ashamed for you. I am ashamed for you all. Cut away from the apron strings Shaun, you will feel better.

I feel better. I feel strong and will continue to tell you all the truth and I will do it publicly if you force me to. My whole life is a matter of public record, of speculation and opinion. It's out there for all to see, on display for scrutiny, with allegations of this and that, all in black and white.

You have tried to publicly humiliate me and in turn my wife and you continue to try to do so. You have humiliated me by your actions and your bullshit. It's always about appearances for you and being seen to be good parents. What the hell was that TV interview when I lost my appeal and you said I was at rock bottom? How did you know Mum? We hadn't spoken for years but you had to keep up appearances and pretend we were one solid unit. It's bullshit. What about the truth? Isn't that what we are all looking for? I say that but in actual fact the only people who are looking for the truth are me and Stephanie, and our friends and our 'family,' all the while having to fight your bullshit at the same time. You really couldn't make this shit up! How dare you say Stephanie has ruined my case? Did you get me out? Can you honestly say you even tried? Are you happy for me to stay in here? Because I am still here, in prison after 10 & a half years so you have no right to give me that crap.

Steff Bon did an okay job until 'The Family' didn't like what she did and then ganged up on her. You tried to control her too. She never crowned herself in glory either, although that's what she wanted people to believe. Why did you bring her back in when my case was referred to the Court of Appeal? Is that so you could all bask in the glory of success. She's just as bad now, the glory hunter, the victim.
Everyone shows their true colours in the end, me included. Chilling hey? 12 days later he tried to end his life. I've often wondered if he was warning his mother by this statement?

For the last time, back off and go away. Call off the dogs (Shaun & Steff Bon).

You may have fooled yourselves into thinking you have done your best by me, but we all know the truth.

Until you can respect me this is the last time I will communicate with you.

I have asked Stephanie to send you this to save my time, money & effort and more importantly to ensure I have confirmation you have received it, so you cannot pretend you didn't.

I want to remind you all, I do not want any of you or your supporters at the appeal court, making another spectacle of yourselves. I will not have a repeat of last time.

A767 8AC Simon John Hall




SH said he had also put this in writing and had asked another prisoner to write out the envelope? Whether or not he sent it, I do not know?

I have a copy of another letter he wrote to his parents not long before his death..

[Stephanie]

In reality, the only person looking for the truth was me. And it was only after SH confessed that it all fell into place.


An eye opener eh Steve?

And it appears I was a mere pawn caught up in the middle of a family feud of power and control that stemmed back way before my involvement.

[Stephanie]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-12195159

There was an interview SH's mother gave to the BBC following his conviction being upheld on appeal in Jan 2011. I was annoyed with her interview because she lied. She lied that she was in contact with SH's legal team, and that they would carry on the fight. She wasn't fighting. She had done nothing for years!

At the time my bias (And other distractions) stopped me from seeing SH's guilt. My focus was on his mother but for the wrong reasons. It was all there but others failed to pick up on it also.http://jeremybamberforum.co.uk/index.php/topic,6736.msg379407.html#msg379407

Her life wasn't on hold as far as I was aware. Her and her husband would have several holidays a year and carried on regardless. I have letters that back this up also.

She mentions talking to family and friends for help? No family member or friend for that matter ever bothered contacting SH in the time I knew him!

Her interviews always bothered me.

There was another interview she did for the Rough Justice documentary and that too is telling. She talks about how "all the girls would pick SH up when he was younger?" I could never get my head around what she meant by this comment and what her motice was for saying it in the first place?

I do however agree with his mother when she states vaguely the laws need changing. They do indeed need changing so that all prisoners who are attempting to deceive the public are monitored and their  grooming patterns of behaviour are acted on.

[Steve_uk]

In reality, the only person looking for the truth was me. And it was only after SH confessed that it all fell into place.


An eye opener eh Steve?

And it appears I was a mere pawn caught up in the middle of a family feud of power and control that stemmed back way before my involvement.

Yes Stephanie I can see that you are a victim, though I don't really want to comment further except to say you are close to your subject matter as Mike is with his, whilst many of us here are somewhat detached, which may or may not be a good thing. I discern that writing may have a therapeutic value to yourself. I can see some parallels in Colin's book, which has helped me personally with my bereavement. I would only request that you are polite to other members of this site whom I regard as friends, whatever side of the argument they happen to be on. Sometimes we all get het up and need to take a breather.